Bad customer service in the autumn of life

Dealt:

Woke up to an email from MB Customer Service saying they regret to inform me that they cannot reverse my credit card's late charges because I paid after the deadline.

Fuckers.

So, for maybe the second time in my life, I sent an email complete with ALL CAPS, BOLD, red text, and underlines. In some cases,  ALL THREE TOGETHER. There was an ! somewhere in there too.

Among the formatting expletives, there were screenshots and reference numbers to show that I tried to pay a full 9 days before the deadline, but their system failed. And didn't tell me it failed.

The most exasperating part is that the last email was obviously sent by an ignorant millenial who did not bother to investigate more than an inch deep into the situation, and responded without using their out of shape brain.

But what I'm wondering at is, for the first time in my decades' experience of bad customer service, I'm actually showing anger in written form. Is it because I'm turning 50 in a month?

They say that as you get older, you lose that filter that keeps you from telling fuckers that they can go shoot themselves twice since they will miss the first time for sure. Maybe my filter is peeling away, and the regenerative cells are dying.

What a relief! To be able to tell people to their faces what I really think of them without hesitation or fear or regret. Is it the fact that you know deep down that you will die soon, and what that other person thinks is no longer of consequence?

We should be born dying. We actually are, we just don't realize it until we turn 49, 11 months, and two days.

Hand

Pursuit of Happyness pt 2

Maybe happiness is found when you focus all your moments on getting the needful task done, not in the search for what will give you pleasure. The sense of fulfillment, no matter how small the task, will get you through the most difficult of times. And in times of abundance, the joy is brighter, sharper.

Wash the dishes, sweep the floor, pay the bill, do the accounting. Don't think about it, just do it. The rest should follow.

Hand:

Mind Room

Not mind palace, only Sherlocks and Cromwells have those.

My mind is like a room, thoughts like familiar furniture, revisited everyday, dusted sometimes. Think minimalist: white tiled floor, the bare necessities in their corners, side tables with things I use everyday- hairbrush, ponytail, a rag for wiping. Ooh, there's a piano too. My kindle is always just there.

On the floor are Things To Do in packed and unpacked boxes. Sometimes the floor is clear and all I have to do is sweep away the dust and mop away the spills. But today they are cluttered about the room, and I can't think straight tripping over these boxes.

The Game

All right, this is how we will play. 

I'm not much of a card player, but the metaphor was too deliciously apt. Let's suppose that every card has its ranking from top (best) to bottom (worst). For example: Aces are top and the 2 is bottom. 

Ace
King
Queen
Jack
10 ... down to 2 huhu

For suits, from top to bottom: 

Spades
Hearts
Diamonds
Clubs

Each situation in these stories will be symbolized as a single card deal to add to a card or set of cards you already hold. The situation's outcome is the hand you have after the card is dealt.

The first card

The first card is 'Dealt', which tells you if the thing that happened was good or bad, and to what level.

An Ace of Spades is the best.thing.ever, like falling in love, or winning a million dollars free of tax and hangers on.

best.thing.ever.

A Two of Clubs is just about rock bottom (let's not give examples)

rock bottom

Everything else in between are different levels of yayy, fuck that, and meh.

pretty great!

meh

The second card/s

Let's say you were dealt a 2 of clubs (worst.thing.ever.), but in your hand you had a 2 of spades and a 2 of hearts.

surviving not thriving

 After you've been dealt, you have a pretty rockin' hand:

chicken dinner

importance of consequences

 It is a very bad thing to not allow children to reap the consequences of their actions. Impunity will breed a lack of accountability, laziness, and victim mentality. Case in point: my own son.

...

It is good for the soul to be loved. But it is bad for the character to be pampered, or smothered.

They say there is strength in being able to ask for help, but that only comes when you have tried to help yourself. There is also strength in refusing help, when you know you can do it for yourself.

Pursuit of Happiness

(Taking up this title from over two years ago, not having any recollection of what it was supposed to be about at the time.)

The pursuit of happiness as a constitutional right is just wrong.

What effect could it have, except to develop the misconception that happiness is something that is pursued, and even worse, something you have a right to? Happiness is an emotion, like anger, frustration, sadness. It cannot live in a vacuum without becoming one. It gets it value precisely in its contrast to sadness/anger/frustration.

Rather, happiness should be considered a side effect. The real pursuits should be for Purpose, Goodness, Truth, Knowledge, Unity. When we achieve these, happiness is just the side effect.

for our own protection

Is it for our own protection that the mind is unable to recall the worst moments ever?

One True

There is one true God, but not one true form of worship.

 Beneath the rubble of each calamity, we nurse a silent exultation: I have survived.

warning

 words are dangerous. use sparingly.

What about this weather we're having?

I too am guilty of starting conversations by talking about the weather. Just this morning, with the mailman, in fact. Weather as a topic has been criticized as shallow, inane, pointless. But it is a safe way to open a connection with a stranger, so that they are no longer strange. It is something we all experience in common, regardless of our background and circumstances. And it is a door, slightly ajar, which can be opened wider or slammed shut.

2004-2005

old, old entries no longer publishable for some reason. posting their preview screenshots. for posterity, future sources of embarrassment, or just because i can't stand things going to waste :P

perspective

I've seen fb posts asking for pictures of smiling mothers, or cute pets, or friendship messages to 'flood facebook with positivity', in an effort to blot out the negative posts. Not one to post much myself, I usually don't respond, but it got me to thinking, what do people usually see in facebook? I can imagine a lot of trolling, bad news, anger and frustration, but I don't see much of it when I scroll, and I certainly don't click to zoom if I do. I see lots of jokes, people laughing, food shots (some not so appetizing). And of course, the token vanity selfies. 

When I read the news, there's a lot of greed, corruption, abuse, and now, sickness and death. It is depressing, and makes me think, what a horrible world this is, I just want to hide under a rock.

But I think again, to the last time I was "out there", and remember.. the bank teller who always has a smile for everyone (and it's not plastered on). the man at the checkout counter who let me pay first because I had just a couple of items. the driver that let me pass as I tried to cross the street. And then I see, that no, it's not a horrible world, at least not where I live. 

Not to say that we should put blinders on, and pretend the horror isn't there. But if we put it in perspective, and act nevertheless with kindness, see with understanding rather than bias, then the horror becomes small and distant, almost unreal. 

Same thing happens on facebook. If you focus on the posts that give joy, then that's what you get as well.

As with the world, facebook is what you make it. 

traffic

sometimes it seems like every other driver out there is a fucking moron or a fucking asshole. bless the few rays of light when a considerate driver lets another car or pedestrian pass. fuck the idiot traffic guard for berating me for letting a pedestrian pass instead of running him down like i think he wanted me to.

that's all for today.

sharing

Even when I was still a programmer, I was amazed at people who went out of their way to share their knowledge with strangers. When I'd get stuck in my code, there was often someone out there with the same problem, and miraculously, someone else with the answer. 

(Now that I think about it, I was never a very good programmer. Any code breakthroughs and bug fixes I made were almost always at the tail end of a google search.)

I've always been a parasite in the online community, never contributing what I had learned, even when I saw unanswered questions that I knew the solution to. Too lazy, too selfish, I guess. 

And now, trying something new (that I'm also not very good at), again I am saved by a stranger. Thanks to her blog post , I was able to finish my little project for my niece's birthday: a little shoulder bag to go with this cute little dress we bought for her. I was about to toss the bag in the bin it was so ugly, but this little fabric flower really turned it around.

Yes, this is light years away from programming. But it's the same spirit of sharing. Thank you, kind strangers, from the java geeks of years ago to the sewing goddesses now, thank you so much. Someday, maybe I'll have something to share too :D

Keeping cool.

It used to irritate me to no end to see our refrigerator looking like this:

Stacks and stacks of water bottles taking up half the fridge space! My 'common sense' told me it was stupid and pointless, we only need at most a couple bottles at a time. But I kept my mouth shut and let it slide.

Then, a couple of weeks ago, I read an article that refrigerators are actually more energy-efficient when they're full than when they're empty. 

Huh?! (gears creaking) ohh.... right!

Good thing I kept my mouth shut hehe.

Build or Buy?

What do you do with your free time? 

For most of us, it's hard to carve out a couple hours in a day to pursue a hobby. But unless you work at Ac*****re, most of us have weekends, and this is when we find time to do the stuff we want to do (get a haircut/get drunk/nurse a hangover/sleep). Problem is, weekends are notorious for never being long enough. So if this time is valuable to you, you want to maximize your weekend as much as possible, right? And if you're not gifted with Marcos or Napoles as your surname, you want to maximize the little that's in your wallet, too.

Let's analyze a common weekend task: getting a gift for a friend. How long would it take and how much would it cost?

Buy:

30 mins: travel to mall (Gas: P40)
5 mins: find parking
5 mins: walk to the store
30 mins: pick out the gift, line up and pay for the gift (Gift: artsy fartsy journal, P200*)
5 mins: walk back to the car
5 mins: pay for and leave the parking lot (Parking fee: P40)
30 mins: travel back home (Gas: P40)

Total time: 1 hour 50 minutes
Total cost: P320 

*Forget Moleskine. Let's assume it's a cheap journal, we're on a budget remember

.

In short, around two hours and P300 to buy a gift assuming you don't stop for coffee, do any window shopping, or take a bathroom break.

Just for kicks, I tried to answer the question: how long would it take to build a journal? And here's what I got:

Build:

15 mins: gathering the materials
30 mins: cutting and gluing
90 mins: sewing and assembling
20 mins: trimming and details

Total time: 2 hours 50 minutes (total cost: P0**)

**I used materials just lying around the house--old, yellowing bond paper, cardboard, leather fabric scraps, thread, glue, electric tape.


So there it is. I spent an extra hour making the thing, but with zero cash-out. Granted, it's not going to win the Nobel Prize for arts and crafts, but I had fun making it, I used stuff that would have otherwise just been thrown away, I ended up with a gift that's more personal and heartfelt than anything you can buy in a store, and finally--this is my favorite part--I didn't spend a single cent!!

Of course, this 'build' option is not for everyone. But the option is there, if you stop and take a little time to think about it.

Reduce. Reuse. Recycle.

Found my 9-year-old blog which has been dormant for 7 years, and it's called "ten years later". Go figure.

In the spirit of the three R's above, I decided to revive this blog today, after removing the old posts which made my skin crawl (did I really put those thoughts out there??).

Back to the title. RRR may not yet be everyone's, but it's my new holy grail. Not the trendy buy recycled table napkins and drive hybrid cars crap. A little bit harder core and more sincere than that, hopefully. You'll see what I mean soon enough.

And, also hopefully, anyone who chances to see this might get some RRR rubbed off on them. It just might save a tree or an animal or (illusions of grandeur) a river even, someday. Hopefully!